Self-Care That Works for You
Developing self-care practices is key to building great mental health. When thinking about and developing self-care practices, it’s important to remember that not all self-care is equal. Effective self-care must actually address the problems that we are dealing with. You can take spa days and vacations, but they don’t necessarily help you change your relationships or help you think more positively about yourself.
So what makes effective self-care? These are a few things you should consider:
1. Self-care is just for us.
It’s important to understand the motivation behind our self-care activities. Is this something that YOU want to do for YOURSELF, or are you doing it to benefit someone else? For example, exercising to feel good in your body and keep yourself healthy is very different from exercising to lose weight so that your partner will find you more attractive. Making time to read because you enjoy it is different than reading for your job or because your friend is pressuring you to join their book club. The same activities may or may not be effective self-care based on our underlying motivations.
2. Self-care activities should happen regularly and be easily accessible.
If you’re waiting for your yearly vacation to relax and refresh yourself, you’re waiting too long. You may enjoy yourself on vacation, but you’ll likely come back to your regular life just as exhausted and burnt out as before. Self-care should happen regularly (like, daily or several times a week) and should include activities that you have easy access to. Activities like guided meditations, walking, listening to music, or taking a nap are free or cheap for us and can offer us a bit of respite throughout the day.
3. Self-care isn’t always comfortable.
I love a spa day and a massage like everyone else, but self-care doesn’t always feel relaxing or calming. Sometimes self-care means doing the hard work to take care of ourselves, to grow as people, and challenge ourselves to change. Self-care can look like spending time with friends when we’ve been isolating ourselves. It can look like going to therapy, building new habits, or having hard (but much needed) conversations with our loved ones (all of which can be very uncomfortable).
Want to start developing your own self-care practices but not sure where to start? I created a free assessment on the 4 Domains of Self-Care to help guide you toward what kinds of self-care activities will be most effective for you. Click here to download your free PDF!
